Expanding Time

How would you like all the time in the world to do what's necessary? The mystics say that we have it, so why do we always feel behind?

One reason is that we’re out of tune with our own personal rhythm. Being out of rhythm puts us into tension, takes us out of flow, we are out of sync with the timing of things (and people) around us, everything gets crunchy.

When we are in sync, time expands. It’s calming, kind, and nurturing. The body doesn't go in a fight or flight. It stays relaxed, so you have less chronic pain, you sleep better, you hear better, and it puts you into flow with everything around you.

As leaders, understanding and using rhythm gives us an edge. Instead of the old ‘push through’ that takes its toll on us (and our teams), finding our rhythm means we get where we want to go AND we have the energy to both enjoy it and continue.

“Our nature is to breathe and be in rhythm.” ~ Stephanie J. Allen

• 06:34 Tuning into your own rhythm
• 07:49 Tuning into another’s rhythm
• 08:15 Slowing down time
• 10:42 Making space for choice
• 11:45 Doing the practice

Today, Stephanie and Maren share time, rhythm, connection and flow shortcuts in a quick and powerful podcast. You will love learning more about getting in touch with your own rhythm;  it’s the only way we can really connect to another - and connection is what makes business, and life, work.

TRANSCRIPT

Watch on Youtube

Please share your insights and questions in one of our Soulful Leaders groups:

Facebook Group

LinkedIn Group

Get all the latest episodes, news and updates directly to your inbox. Subscribe here. TheSoulfulLeaderPodcast.com

Watch the podcasts on our YouTube Channel: @Soulful Leaders

Transcript

Stephanie Allen: 0:04

In a world where we have everything and it's still not enough, we're often left wondering, is this really it?

Maren Oslac: 0:10

Deep inside you know, there's more to life you're ready to leave behind the old push your way through and claim the deeper, more meaningful life that's calling you.

Stephanie Allen: 0:19

That's what we invite you to explore with us.

Maren Oslac: 0:22

We're your hosts,

Stephanie Allen: 0:23

Stephanie Allen and

Maren Oslac: 0:25

Maren Oslac, and this is The Soulful Leader Podcast.

Stephanie Allen: 0:30

Yay!

Maren Oslac: 0:32

Welcome back to The Soulful Leader Podcast. I'm Maren, and I'm here with Stephanie, and we've been chatting about rhythm, and it's interesting because, you know, having just the Olympics just finished, there's rhythmic gymnastics, and there's rhythmic swimming, and there is a rhythm to all these things in our lives. And I remember hearing somebody, one of the announcers talking about, there's a particular swimmer that has... they're also a drummer... and so they have this rhythm and it's made them very excellent at what they do. And I don't think that we as leaders think enough, or work with, rhythm enough, we push ourselves through things instead of finding the rhythm that works well for us.

Stephanie Allen: 1:32

I think this is so powerful because it's like the breath. The breath has a rhythm. If you're holding your breath, you're going to hold tension. As you relax your breath, you actually drop. And what I mean by dropping into your body, you're more connected to your body. And this is relating, not only that there's a time for all things, but how do you know when it's time for something? It connects with that rhythm. If you're in a musical band, you know, there's that rhythm of the drum that keeps that pace. And if that drummer has not practiced his skill or her skill, then it's really hard for the rest of the band to find that heartbeat. I mean, that's our heartbeat as well, right? And so, I think this is such a key thing, because what is one's rhythm, and how does one connect to one's rhythm? And how do you know when you're out of rhythm?

Maren Oslac: 2:32

Yeah, I think about the metaphors of like we're out of sync, right? And stuff like that. And I also, when you were talking, I was hearing the layers of rhythms, because there is your personal rhythm, and then there's your rhythm with your family and the rhythm with your team and the rhythm with your business. And so when you know, like, I love, that you brought up the breath, because, if at the foundational level, and how many of us hold our breath, I know, you know, like, even with all of my breath work and my awareness and all of that, I do, still find myself holding my breath

Stephanie Allen: 3:16

Well, you know, and something that I find too is that is to turn it inward, I'm kind of getting on to where you're going. It's like, yes, there's all of these multiple levels of parts of our lives that are in sync or out of sync and need to come into right timing or right rhythm with each other, and we can't wait for everything else to kind of show up. The only thing we really, truly have creative life force over is our own inner rhythm, and that is turning inward. And I think of that as a soulful leader is going to the inner landscape of, okay, am I breathing? How am I breathing? What's going on? Am I in touch with what's going on internally with myself? Because we tend to look at external... hey, if it's sunny out, I'm happy. If it's not sunny out, I'm miserable. Versus going, what is the inner weather going on inside myself? And so the only way I'm going to do that is to actually come into union or communion or communication with what's going on internally with myself, and helping it find my own internal rhythm. Because when that happens, just like the drummer in the band, if that, if that drummer has practiced relentlessly and really knows when that, when they're in or out of rhythm, it literally helps to influence all the outer. If you speed that up everybody else in the band has to speed up. If they slow it down, everyone else in the band. It's an actual, almost, in a way, of control, even though the only thing that we're controlling is really our true self. And who is that? What is that? And where do we begin?

Maren Oslac: 4:54

As a dancer, I really relate to this because I would always prefer dancing to pre-recorded music, because they have, like the metronome and everything is very... the rhythm doesn't change. That drummer is able to keep that that rhythm. And what I found is dancing to live bands, the drummer, you know, we're human, right? So there would be variation, and I would always feel it as a dancer, of like, oh, we just sped up. Oh, we just slowed down. And I like where you went with that. Of there is the only thing that I truly have my own control over, is myself and my inner landscape. And so if I can find that rhythm, and I love that, our bodies do it naturally. You know, an oak tree becomes an oak tree because that's its pre- program like, that's its nature. Our nature is to breathe and be in rhythm. And when we get out of sync, it's kind of a sign for us, of like, Oops, growing the wrong way! And I use that intentionally'growing the wrong way', because we always are growing and changing. And so there's like, okay, I can actually readjust that, or adjust that to come back into what's my natural rhythm? Then I'm in better rhythm with the people around me.

Stephanie Allen: 6:34

And I was just gonna say that, like, you know, how do we then upgrade it? It's like, first we have to look with our own rhythm. Are we even aware of, like, what is my rhythm? Where am I going with this? You know, is it too fast? Is it too slow? Is it just right? Do I even know my rhythm and what nourishes me? And it's going to change because it, you know, if it's going to stay the same rhythm, that's like flat line like someone's dead.

Maren Oslac: 6:56

It's the pre-recording that I talked about, right? We're not prerecorded.

Stephanie Allen: 7:01

Right! It's life. It's gonna be changing. But if we don't get in touch with our own rhythm first and know what that is, then we can't really connect to another. So one of the practices that I do when I'm working with a client or even just a friend you know you're hanging out with, is that I'll tune in first to my own rhythm so that I know when it feels off or on, or like a kinesthetic sense of like, oh I'm stirred up a bit, or I'm not breathing. Or....(sigh)

Maren Oslac: 7:31

That's a great practice, right there. It's like, just okay, when I walk into the room... oh, I'm holding my breath because there's a bunch of people I don't know. Or I love new people... so let me, I've sped up a little bit. Just tuning in and finding out where you are in your own rhythm. I love that.

Stephanie Allen: 7:49

Then tuning into someone else's rhythm. Are they breathing? Are they going too fast, too slow, and then being able to be the harmony, it's like you're not trying to mirror them, unless you are, or you're harmonizing with them. And then as you start to work with your own rhythm, why is this important? Because all of a sudden, you hear them differently, you feel them differently, you see things you actually slow time down. So we talk about time. Time is really an illusion. As Einstein says, there is no time. Time, although there's the paradox, it's like although there is time, but we tend to think of it as something that we are out of control with. So if you go into your own inner timing and you slow your breath down. I've done this in traffic before. It's like, oh my gosh, I'm late. I'm late. I got something else and I gotta do somewhere else. My mind is everywhere. And when it does that, you know, my consciousness, my awareness, is everywhere. But it's not here, that's not now. What helps me to bring it into the Now is the breath. And then what happens is, as I start to breathe and bring my awareness into my breath, time kind of goes away.

Maren Oslac: 9:08

I've noticed that, too.

Stephanie Allen: 9:09

All of a sudden, you know, as I'm in stuck in traffic, all of a sudden, there seems to be like space for me to navigate through and around all of the traffic. And I, amazingly, can get somewhere with a lot less stress, with a lot more energy, and often on time. So it's like, the paradox, right? So I often gift this practice, both to myself and to those who are always like,...Oh, I wish I had more time. There's a saying we have all the time in the world to do what's necessary. And when you are totally in your heart and you're in love with something or someone or something, you know your breath actually slows down and deepens, and it actually expands time.

Maren Oslac: 9:54

And that's when we usually feel like, oh my God, I have so much time. We notice how beautiful everything is, and, you know, because we're in love, right? Yeah, and it does. There's, there's actual science behind that. (Laughter)

Stephanie Allen: 10:10

We're in the Now moment. So past is not really where our mind is, and we're also not into the future, because we're here now, which expands your time.

Maren Oslac: 10:22

And that's where all potential lives is in the Now moment. And so it, when part of, going into a little bit of the science of this is when you're in your car and all you're thinking about is the fact that you're late, you are not present.

Stephanie Allen: 10:37

Yeah, because you're thinking about, Oh my gosh, what's going to happen when I'm late? They're going to yell at me....in the future. I'm going to

Maren Oslac: 10:42

You are in the future...I'm going to miss out and I'm always, always late...those things and blah, right? So you're either in the future in the past, and that means that there's no choice. You have no space. There is no choice because the future hasn't happened yet and the past is already done. So how could there be choice in either of those places? So the only place that I can change anything is in the current moment. And that practice that you gave of slowing down the breath and becoming present in like.... Okay, I'm here now.

Stephanie Allen: 11:13

Yeah and wanting that rhythm, that rhythm is so calming, it's so kind, it's so nurturing. The body doesn't go in a fight or flight. It stays relaxed, so you have less chronic pain, you sleep better, you hear better, oh my gosh. It's like life is better.

Maren Oslac: 11:29

Yeah and when you have a practice, when you've done I love what you usually say, so I'm going to say it for you, which is, we practice the things when we don't need it, so that when we do need it, it's there for us.

Stephanie Allen: 11:44

100%!

Maren Oslac: 11:45

And so having, starting this practice for yourself of noticing your own breathing and your own rhythm coming into sync, possibly, or at least being aware of somebody else's rhythm and their breathing and where they are, those are two amazing practices for anyone. Then also for anyone in a leadership position, because it literally can change the direction in a moment of a meeting, of a bad sales call, of just about anything. You can change your traffic patterns. You could not be late when you're actually a little bit late.

Stephanie Allen: 12:25

You can change your patterns when you have space. You can. It all comes down to your rhythm and timing. Change your breath, change your rhythm, change your timing, change time.

Maren Oslac: 12:37

Excellent. All right. Well, thank you guys for joining us this week. We decided we'd play with going deeply into one thing, and a little bit shorter. So let us know your thoughts on that. How did you like today's podcast? You can find us on social media, at The Soulful Leaders and you can also find us at our website, TheSoulfulLeaderPodcast.com. We'll see you all next week.

Stephanie Allen: 13:12

And that wraps up another episode of The Soulful Leader Podcast with your hosts, Stephanie Allen

Maren Oslac: 13:18

and Maren Oslac. Thank you for listening. If you'd like to dive deeper, head over to our website, at www.TSLP.life

Stephanie Allen: 13:29

Until next time...